By The Hunger
B-Bombs Away
The atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki effectively ended the Japanese war machine during World War Two. When you and your buddy are talking to a couple of girls and all of a sudden one of them drops the “Boyfriend Bomb” – BOOM! You can stop hitting on her.
To the untrained ear, it’s a mere passage of conversation; in reality, it’s more orchestrated than the Kennedy assassination. B- Bombs are unsuspecting. NORAD would have a hard time detecting which girls do and do not have the ability to fire conversational missiles. Here are three common methods of deployment:
- Early in the conversation – She doesn’t like you.
- Mid-way through the conversation – She wants you to stop hitting on her.
- At the end of a long conversation – She was starting to like you.
When it is mentioned, military calmness is needed to soothe the situation. Not much can be done at this point in the conversation, unless you’re a bit of a sadist and enjoy the thrill of girls with boyfriends. Not me.
When I was younger, if a girl said she had a boyfriend, I’d ask more questions than a Jewish grandmother. A perverse interest in someone you’ll never meet, just to play it cool. Another option is to comment on how lucky or fortunate the guy is. Most lines in that vein, however well intended, come out as differing brands of cheddar – utter cheese.
B-Bombs over Palma de Mallorca
A mate and I were having a game of pool and a couple of cheeky midday beers at a local cantina in Palma, when we were intrigued as to why a cute French girl also had the same idea. We chatted for quite a long time; she was enjoying the conversation and clearly knew we were trying to pick her up. She invited us to a party that weekend, so we were later surprised when an invisible button was pressed and a 9-letter bomb was deployed. My friend and I both let out a silent “oh man” when the French girl dropped the B-Bomb. We silently nodded to finish our cervezas and bounced in search of another bar.
Maybe some girls enjoy seeing the creative exit strategies of guys, maybe Iraq should tell the US they have B-Bombs. All jokes aside, it was a funny moment because my mate and I knew exactly what one another was thinking. And to the untrained eye it may have seemed like this whole charade was invisible to her. I genuinely doubt it. .
Girls with boyfriends are and will always be a fact of life. But sometimes I think they enjoy playing a different character for a little while longer than necessary. Must be the same as when guys hold off on unleashing the “G-Bomb.”
No matter which country you’re from, these are the biological rules of engagement. It wouldn’t work any other way.
i like the theory, girls like to indulge themselves everyone likes to be flattered… so hats off to those girls who are happy enough with who they are and what they have AND DROP THE B-BOMB EARLY!!
Nice. I hear ya!I'm now married and unfortunatley out of the 'flag snatching' game. Oh the shame. When I was a 'snatcher', however, I had a mantra I recited when the dreaded b-bomb was deployed; ''speed humps not stop signs''. I recommend it. It can help you to persist despite the odds and maybe you'll get a taste of the forbidden fruit. It's always better when you know they have a boyfriend. To hell with the collateral damage. It's hers not yours!Great site guys. Very amusing!
I agree with both Richard and Tom: don't give up hope if you've been B-bombed or smoke-screened for an exit strategy.
Hypothetical: you're single, she's not – but she's keen. You're not the one cheating, she is. (Same applies to girls who get "G-bombed".) Next time you hear bombs whistling towards you, remember to stay the course.
No one has yet pointed out the dummy devices that are sometimes deployed as a smoke-screen for an exit. Oh yes, that pretty young thing does have the capacity to lie if she feels less attracted to you than at the start of the conversation. The B-Bomb is a tool that females will deploy if they need an exit strategy – if you back out after the B-Bomb you may be playing into their hands and the only flag you'll receive is the white flag of surrender!! Stick around – she might warm to you again and retract the B-Bomb?